Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Friends and facebook and Angst

It's been a while since I've done a blog but I'm back again and I have a few things to say about Friendship and facebook and angst.  

Facebook is a funny place when you think about it. It is a virtual world where we connect with people that we might have actually met and those that are, for all intense and purposes, simply phantoms in our lives.

We go to a page and we say we like the subject and we can exchange words with others. We can do that over and over and we will 'friend' or be 'friended' by those we come in contact with. Those with similar likes. In that respect I've been very fortunate in that I'm a member of communities of women who share some of the same loves that I do.  

There are women in those 'Pages' that I admire and respect. I admire the talent and the character they share with the world. I respect that they are individuals who have private lives and lines that shall not be crossed. We are 'friends' in a virtual world that exists in cyberspace and nowhere else. These are not the people you will run into while you're shopping for groceries or filling your car with gas.

Unless you are invited to do so there are lines that should not be crossed with those you know from facebook. You don't ask for names, addresses or phone numbers. If that information is offered that is one thing but it should not be sought. And if private information is offered without reason or inappropriately flags should be rising all over the place.

Whenever there is even the hint of something funky make a copy, do a screen print. Document even the slightest incident because someday it may come in handy. If someone gives you pause for thought once make note of it and it there is a repeat run in the other direction as fast as you can and block them from all avenues of access that you think they may try.

Last but not least do not engage in discussions on the pros and cons of your action. Warn those you know might be effected about a potential danger and disengage. The person sending off warning bells and raising flags will have defenders who may take issue with your action. In the end you can't take that into account. You may respect those defenders but that doesn't mean you need to change your mind. Stick you your guns.

There will be angst. You might be criticized and loose a virtual friend or two. Ignore it. Trust your instincts and know that you've done the right thing. If a person you've never met and you have no true relationship with 'unfriends' you haven't really lost anything except a few lines of type on a screen.  

Now you all go ahead and have a wonderful time. Play games, chat and enjoy. Just be careful out there.